Matt-ah

Last week was the last week for Matt in China. He came over to Suzhou for a brief 3 month stay to work and help me with one of my departments. I’ve known Matt for many years and he is a hard worker and someone that I trust to provide input on many things. We both have kind of a strange sense of humor which probably was not understood at all by the Chinese but we always would have fun at work and still get the work done that was needed. Matt arrived in early May and at the end of July it was time for him to go back. If you want, take a look at Matt’s observations of China in his blog which I have linked; Matt’s China Cabinet. The experience with Matt highlights some aspects of living abroad.

Part of the life of an Expat is to accept that most other Expats are only around for a relatively short time. This means that you will meet people, get to know them (a little or a lot, it depends) and then say goodbye (whether it is them leaving or eventually, you leaving). Matt’s situation was the same but also different at the same time. The difference is that I’ve known Matt for a long time. While we worked together back in the US; we only communicated at work and never did anything outside of work (although we talked a lot about things other than work). We worked closely on many projects and so I knew him well and I respect him for his ability to do many things beyond being a machine operator (not that there is anything wrong with that, being a good operator is a great skill to have).

Another part of the Expat experience is to help other Expats become acclimated to their surroundings. When I was told that they had asked him to come over, we communicated via e-mail back and forth to get him ready (at least as ready as anyone can be). As you might imagine, he had plenty of questions and we did our best to get him the right answers. Once here, along with the other Expats here from my company, we helped Matt find his way around Suzhou. We took Matt around to see just a few of the local sights like Tiger Hill, The Master of Nets Garden and Fengqiao Scenic Area. We also took the time to go to Shanghai with him to give him a feel for the city. During his three month stay, it was really nice to get a chance to hang out with Matt outside of work and do things with him that had absolutely nothing with work. The friendship that we had before I left the US grew stronger during his time here and so it wasn’t like he was just another “short termer” in Suzhou. Matt helped me in many ways. He was a sounding board for me when problems came up and he has always had good input. Although I would say I am lucky that some of the kids at work understand English, having someone with experience running the machine that would use the same terms that I used made it much simpler. His experience was also needed to help me to look around the machine and find the causes for different alarms or machine faults. This is where having an experienced maintenance group would come in handy but we’ve got to teach them from the ground up. Sometimes, being “hands on” and wanting to do the work yourself is not the best thing for others. You need to allow people to get to know the machine and the best way is to let them work problems with you right alongside to help. Making mistakes is also something that comes along with that and sometimes the best way to learn is to make an error and then have to fix it. To sit back and let this happen is frustrating but a necessary part of training.

Although he was another foreigner at AJTF he seemed to fit in with most of the young operators very well (although with some it took a little more time). They accepted him since he was one of them and I was viewed a bit differently, perhaps more like a boss. He was told right away that he was “cool” (they never told me that, {sniff, sniff}). Towards the end of this stay, I was able to take a different approach with the kids and that was to meet with them outside of work, which we did (check out the blog post Meeting the Kids and stay tuned for the pending blog post Night in the Tunnel) and I think that has helped build some bridges and better relationships. It was easier to do this with Matt since meeting them on my own would require me to carry the conversation, which is not something that makes me very comfortable. But with Matt’s help I will continue to carry the torch since I think this does make a difference (I was told this a long time ago but I wasn’t really sure that it was true but it turns out I was perhaps mistaken). This will be just one of the many legacy items from Matt’s visit. There will be many more that relate to the machine performance, the skill level of the operators, etc. but those I won’t post since they would probably not mean anything unless you know the operation.

The one other thing about Expat living here is that due to the relative isolation, separation from friends and family; that you (in my opinion) either build stronger relationships or the experience overwhelms you and you compensate through other perhaps self-destructive methods. If you think about it, it’s really a rather simple point. People tend to hang out with people like themselves (which is what would be called a comfort zone). When you are surrounded with people different than you and have a hard time communicating, making a frustrating experience for both sides, you fall back on the comfort zone to keep your sanity. Although Tammy and I have lived at large distances from our families, we were never more than a couple of hours drive or flight away. She has made friends here but as I mentioned in my first point, friends will to leave so you are always meeting new people. Tammy posted this before, here you either decide to open up to people quickly or you are kind of by yourself. To go back to the point, you build a stronger relationship with your family (if your family is with you otherwise it's co-workers or perhaps you find a good friend) since they are the ones that will be there or I think you flounder a little and compensate with whatever else fills the void for you.

So, I started off by talking about Matt and then went off track for a little discussing some of the aspects of living the Expat life (from my viewpoint). The point I was trying to make (I think) is that it was difficult to say goodbye to Matt for many reasons. Because I knew him beforehand, it made the situation slightly different than the standard Expat interaction. I really enjoyed having him over here and getting the chance to know him better. I also greatly appreciate the effort he put in here at work, which was really to help me more than anything else. He allowed me to focus on other departments and other issues that needed my attention without making many sacrifices in other departments. He also helped me to communicate better with the operators. Unfortunately, like many of the other Expats you meet, once they go home, the chances are that you will never see them again. At the end of my time in China who knows where I will end up but the chances of working with Matt again are very slim. So, we’ve known each other for more than 15 years and this was probably the last time we will have a chance to hang out. That’s why it is the same but also different. I will miss Matt being here and hope the best for him upon his return to the US.