MMmm, MMmm Durian

As I have noted in a prior post, Durian (I believe I mistakenly called is daschi in the post but since I’ve edited it, there’s no proof) is a fruit I first saw on Andrew Zimmerman’s Bizarre Foods. This is a guy that eats just about anything and everything. He even goes back for more when he finds the food disgusting (just to be sure….yep, it does taste like gym sock sweat wrung over moldy cheese). This is one of the foods that he intensely dislikes (along with oddly enough, Spam). A quick data blurb on Durian (warning, educational content…). Widely-known and revered in Southeast Asia as the "king of fruits", the durian is distinctive for its large size, unique odor, and formidable thorn-covered husk. The edible flesh emits a distinctive odor, strong and penetrating even when the husk is intact. Some people regard the durian as fragrant; others find the aroma overpowering and offensive. The smell evokes reactions from deep appreciation to intense disgust. The odor has led to the fruit's banishment from certain hotels and public transportation in Southeast Asia. The image below is from Singapore where the fruit is banned from the mass transit systems. I have seen the fruit at the local markets but I haven’t smelled it….yet. Or perhaps I did and just didn’t realize that the odor was coming from the fruit.

Anyhow, back to the story. Last night we went to the Banana Leaf restaurant down by Walking Street, it’s a Thai place. I’m having withdrawals from the lack of Thai food….this was a lunch staple back in Jonesboro. Flavors of Thailand, at least once per week, it was always good. So Jenny knew I am a Thai food junkie and knew that this was a good place to go so we hopped in a cab and headed to the area. We got to the Banana Leaf and it seemed empty until we stepped on the escalator and went to the second floor where it was bustling with activity. Always a good sign to see a full restaurant, it’s got to be good. We sat down and looked at the novel that was the menu (side note: many times the menus have too many options and we’ve gotten into the habit of putting “bookmarks” in the menu book to find what we want to order). I was used to the basics, L20, L24, L17, you know the standard routine for Chinese places in the US. We ordered many of the recommended items, pork neck, fish with mango, bbq sticky rice, green beans, fried noodles with chicken and last but not least (finally, an explanation) durian tarts. Yes, the same Durian that Andrew Zimmerman can’t eat. I was skeptical but decided to take the leap of faith by ordering the tarts (they were recommended). I have not strayed far from the path of “safe foods” but in this case, what harm could a tart be? {insert your own comment here} It was the desert so chances are I could get enough food in me (and hopefully it would stay there) that it wouldn’t ruin the meal. (cue the suspense music, like 24…..tic, tic, tic, tic, fade to black and go to commercial).

The food was excellent, not the same as the Thai place in Jonesboro but very good. The food is served like a Chinese place (clarification, not in the US) where you order a variety of items to share with a group rather than order individually. That’s common here which is why it is difficult to go to a Chinese place by yourself. When you order Sweet and Sour Chicken, you get a large place of Sweet and Sour Chicken (at least I hope it’s chicken). No egg roll, no chicken wing, no rice, no extras (can I have some duck sauce)…no fortune cookie either. So if you want something else, you have to place an order for egg rolls, rice and any other food you want to eat with the main course. So you’re sitting by yourself with 2 – 3 large plates of food in front of you that you take something from each, put it on your plate and eat it. You don’t just pick from each plate and eat it…that would be silly. They gave you a plate, use it. Oh, you want soup, that you have to order as well and unless you can ask, you don’t know what size bowl it’s coming in. It could be a “Jethro” bowl (you know, like the one Jethro used for cereal in the Beverly Hillbillies……try and keep up folks) or a simple small soup bowl perfect for one person. You think you could just order the Sweet and Sour Chicken and eat only that? I doubt it, it’s okay but you need something else as a change of pace even if it’s just plain sticky rice, otherwise it goes from a tasty meal to a mental challenge just to scarf down the next piece of chicken. At least that’s the way it is for me. There are times I’m still hungry but I’m tired of eating and so I stop eating, especially with the chopsticks. Do I want to go through the 10 minutes it’s going to take to eat these little groups of remaining rice? Nope, I’m done, time to move on. Remember when your mom told you there were kids starving in China? This is why….some Westerner has 4 heaping plates of food just for himself because he can’t handle just the entrée. They do have da-bow, doggie bags to take food home so I’m not wasting food. (cue the suspense music…..tic, tic, tic, tic, fade to black and go to commercial).

While we’re waiting on the food, there’s a band moving through the restaurant playing songs and dancing with the people. They stop at our table and start playing some old, folksy music and they get Sharon up to dance, then Steve and then Jenny. Me….I graciously decline to dance. There’s nothing that’ll ruin your appetite quicker than seeing the “white man” dance. Oh yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Word gets out and I’d be like Elaine after she danced at the office party (Seinfeld reference but you probably knew that). The dancing Santa Clause has better moves than I do (he also weighs more than me to but that’s another story). It was fun just to sit and watch, the entertainment made for a different experience and not one that I think the kids would enjoy so much but we’ll wait and see.

So finally, the moment has arrived. I’ve eaten enough to make it through another day and it’s time for the tart. It looks good, it doesn’t smell (a good sign) and the taste……no problem (whew, another crisis averted). It’s basically a pastry outer shell with a durian filling. The filling was sweet but didn’t have the pungent odor, nor the mushy, rotting onion flavor that I was almost expecting (and not in a good way). It was good, not great. I thought the durian custard-type filling was not bad at all. It did have a mushy texture which isn’t normally a good thing for me but it wasn’t objectionable enough to give me the “Pork and Beans” reflex (Oh c’mon!!! Pork and Beans from In Living Color, the Jim Carrey skit where he has the gagging routine. You really need to get out more.). So the moral of the story is…….Andrew Zimmerman is a wimp!!! I conquered Durian where he could not. Does this mean that I’ll buy the fruit and try eating it right out of the husk? Heck No! Are you crazy! It just means that if you cook something long enough and add enough sugar, it’s probably palatable. Keep eating those worms and testicles Andrew; I’ll toast you with a Durian tart. And remember, if something looks good….eat it. See you next time on Bizarre Foods.