Saturday, Alan, Cecelia and I took a trip to U-Town and then over to Walking Street. We picked up a few items at U-Town, an extra battery for my camera and a 4 GB SD memory card for the camera. It was interesting working through the charades at the counter where I stopped to look at the batteries. I pulled out my battery and showed it to them. The lady pulled out her calculator and indicated 65 RMB. I was confused a little since I indicated it was okay and she started to fill out a slip for the battery. I paid and no battery…then out of nowhere, the battery appeared on the counter behind the lady and she cut it from the plastic and gave it to me to try and fit into the camera. No problems, but I still don’t know how the battery I needed appeared. I guess it’s Chinese magic.
While trying to find our way for lunch, we ran into this kid (or more correctly, he ran into us). He was walking along with his two friends when he peeled off like a Blue Angel breaking formation and starting talking to us. Unfortunately for Alan, I said Hello once I heard him say Hello (first mistake….acknowledgement). I assumed he was like so many others that just would say “Hello”, giggle and move on…not this kid. This is a transcript of the communication with the kid who will be known henceforth as CK (Crazy Kid), Alan will be regarded as A, Scott as S…you get the picture.
CK: Where are you from?
A: United States
CK: So you are American. (editor’s note: well duuuhh!)
A: Yes
CK: I like Americans, I like speaking to Americans because I like to speak English. I’ve worked very hard to speak English and I like to find people that speak English so I can practice my English speaking. America is a prosperous nation.
A: China is very prosperous.
S: (walking away and laughing)
CK: How long have you been in China? What’s your impression of Suzhou so far?
A: (becoming more uncomfortable) I like it.
CK: But you know you really look so interesting.
A: (really uncomfortable now) I’m not so sure I’m glad to hear that.
CK: You see, with your white hair and your black sunglasses and you have a big nose.
S: (LMAO!!!)
CK: (garbled words, not sure what he said) You have such a carefree personality. You look so interesting; I like your sense of humor.
A: (looking for a way out…laugh)
CK: So my name is Jimmy, that’s my English name. This year I’m only 15 years old. Originally I should be in school; that is my passion. My mother and I were often beaten by my father. That’s why I have run away from home before. So now I carefree employment {editor’s note…what?}. This year I’m too young and I have no paper, so I accept disappointment. So they just told me employer look for Chinese license so I can just get a job. Because I can’t get a job every day.
A: (lights up a cigarette)
CK: I have no way out, even if I ask 3 plus 5 {editor’s note…huh?} but that’s what I keep for a long time so I’ll be able to study. I love study but now I have no opportunity to study because now I have a beautiful day I’m suffering to death.
A: (Laughing)
C: Help him out Scott.
S: (Tears flowing, can’t breathe from laughing so hard)
CK: Would it be convenient for you to buy me a bread?
A: (incredulous look) Um, I just didn’t know where this conversation was going.
CK: I understand, if you were to just help me a little bit.
A: Did you get your pictures (walking away talking to Cecelia who was filming this encounter)?
Once we knew his end game, we walked away and laughed about the encounter for hours. I had never seen anything like this. This kid spoke very fast and it was like a run on sentence. He just kept talking. This conversation was recorded so the transcript it accurate as far as what I could distinguish. It’s like he memorized sentences and then just strung them all together to weave a story. It was all intended for us to feel sorry for him and to give him money. I don’t think so. Sorry kid, try again with another group of Westerners. It was funny, I’ll give you that but I am not giving out cash here. I really wish I could post this video, it’s so odd but still entertaining but YouTube is still blocked. This was still the highlight of the day. Check back in soon, I’ll post on the Sunday excursion to the North Temple Pagoda plus I still owe the haircut experience (you like that, I’m using teasers now).
One more tidbit, the NFL Draft was this past weekend. Typically I would sit and watch the draft and have Tammy tell me how pathetic I am (it’s one of those “Honey you know I love you BUT…, type things). Even when I was at the soccer fields, I would walk (okay, run) down to the van to turn on the radio and see who was picked by which team. I know, it does sound exciting doesn’t it! Hey, some people watch American Idol and actually vote for these cookie cutter alleged pop stars. Of course when I was younger, I would pickup the draft preview magazines and see if I could figure out who should be picked next by each team. But I just switched to watching the draft in my Cowboys stuff waiting and trying to figure out who they would pick. I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea but when you’re an NFL junkie, it’s what you live for. Now that I’m in China, I could only read about who was picked and I didn’t get to watch any of it. I guess its okay, but football season is going to be tough. John Madden retired and he was the voice of football (BOOM! Brett Favre!) so I guess it makes it a little easier. I mean, c’mon Al “the hairpiece” Michaels, ugh! The only voice more annoying was Crazy Kid Jimmy (I like your sense of humor). Have a good one.
While trying to find our way for lunch, we ran into this kid (or more correctly, he ran into us). He was walking along with his two friends when he peeled off like a Blue Angel breaking formation and starting talking to us. Unfortunately for Alan, I said Hello once I heard him say Hello (first mistake….acknowledgement). I assumed he was like so many others that just would say “Hello”, giggle and move on…not this kid. This is a transcript of the communication with the kid who will be known henceforth as CK (Crazy Kid), Alan will be regarded as A, Scott as S…you get the picture.
CK: Where are you from?
A: United States
CK: So you are American. (editor’s note: well duuuhh!)
A: Yes
CK: I like Americans, I like speaking to Americans because I like to speak English. I’ve worked very hard to speak English and I like to find people that speak English so I can practice my English speaking. America is a prosperous nation.
A: China is very prosperous.
S: (walking away and laughing)
CK: How long have you been in China? What’s your impression of Suzhou so far?
A: (becoming more uncomfortable) I like it.
CK: But you know you really look so interesting.
A: (really uncomfortable now) I’m not so sure I’m glad to hear that.
CK: You see, with your white hair and your black sunglasses and you have a big nose.
S: (LMAO!!!)
CK: (garbled words, not sure what he said) You have such a carefree personality. You look so interesting; I like your sense of humor.
A: (looking for a way out…laugh)
CK: So my name is Jimmy, that’s my English name. This year I’m only 15 years old. Originally I should be in school; that is my passion. My mother and I were often beaten by my father. That’s why I have run away from home before. So now I carefree employment {editor’s note…what?}. This year I’m too young and I have no paper, so I accept disappointment. So they just told me employer look for Chinese license so I can just get a job. Because I can’t get a job every day.
A: (lights up a cigarette)
CK: I have no way out, even if I ask 3 plus 5 {editor’s note…huh?} but that’s what I keep for a long time so I’ll be able to study. I love study but now I have no opportunity to study because now I have a beautiful day I’m suffering to death.
A: (Laughing)
C: Help him out Scott.
S: (Tears flowing, can’t breathe from laughing so hard)
CK: Would it be convenient for you to buy me a bread?
A: (incredulous look) Um, I just didn’t know where this conversation was going.
CK: I understand, if you were to just help me a little bit.
A: Did you get your pictures (walking away talking to Cecelia who was filming this encounter)?
Once we knew his end game, we walked away and laughed about the encounter for hours. I had never seen anything like this. This kid spoke very fast and it was like a run on sentence. He just kept talking. This conversation was recorded so the transcript it accurate as far as what I could distinguish. It’s like he memorized sentences and then just strung them all together to weave a story. It was all intended for us to feel sorry for him and to give him money. I don’t think so. Sorry kid, try again with another group of Westerners. It was funny, I’ll give you that but I am not giving out cash here. I really wish I could post this video, it’s so odd but still entertaining but YouTube is still blocked. This was still the highlight of the day. Check back in soon, I’ll post on the Sunday excursion to the North Temple Pagoda plus I still owe the haircut experience (you like that, I’m using teasers now).
One more tidbit, the NFL Draft was this past weekend. Typically I would sit and watch the draft and have Tammy tell me how pathetic I am (it’s one of those “Honey you know I love you BUT…, type things). Even when I was at the soccer fields, I would walk (okay, run) down to the van to turn on the radio and see who was picked by which team. I know, it does sound exciting doesn’t it! Hey, some people watch American Idol and actually vote for these cookie cutter alleged pop stars. Of course when I was younger, I would pickup the draft preview magazines and see if I could figure out who should be picked next by each team. But I just switched to watching the draft in my Cowboys stuff waiting and trying to figure out who they would pick. I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea but when you’re an NFL junkie, it’s what you live for. Now that I’m in China, I could only read about who was picked and I didn’t get to watch any of it. I guess its okay, but football season is going to be tough. John Madden retired and he was the voice of football (BOOM! Brett Favre!) so I guess it makes it a little easier. I mean, c’mon Al “the hairpiece” Michaels, ugh! The only voice more annoying was Crazy Kid Jimmy (I like your sense of humor). Have a good one.
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