Dora (part III)

So like any good sequel, we continue to describe the daily activities of the Dudley men as we attempt to survive without Tammy. Last night I decided I would cook dinner, not because I wanted to but because I don’t want to order for delivery. We ordered out for delivery on Saturday night and it wasn’t pretty. We decided to try out a Thai place here and found it to be very disappointing. The food was just okay but it wasn’t Thai or at least I didn’t think it tasted like Thailand. Now after being to Thailand I can turn up my nose at places and state in a very aloof manner “That’s not Thai food.” (and so I did, arrogant isn’t it) The food smell indicated right away that they were very heavy-handed on the fish sauce and it totally killed the meal. Warren didn’t mind (big surprise) but for me it was far too much. So that meant we would try and cook for ourselves. I pulled out the big guns and went for the Red Curry since it had been almost a week without curry and I had to get a true Thai fix in before I went into withdrawals. I followed the instructions and the curry came out okay, although the kids didn’t eat as much as they usually do. What’s the comment….your rice is dry. Being the loving parent I declined to beat them senseless and said “Of course it is (all the better to have some for leftovers), it’s with a curry.” I wasn’t defeated, it was edible and there was no “morning after” regret (if you know what I mean).

So food….check. Laundry, I am doing it but I don’t know where it all comes from. The kids seem to believe that if they touch something, it needs to be washed. Maybe it’s true but they wear PJ bottoms and the next day…in the wash. What!?! How about wearing them a couple of days before washing them? If they are standing up in the corner, it’s time to wash, other than that, man up and wear it for two whole days without washing them. Woah! Now that’s crazy talk! It’s insane how much laundry that two kids generate. It was getting to the point that I was going to have to call for “two for Thursday” and “free Friday”, meaning that on Thursday they would wear the same thing they did on Wednesday and on Friday underwear was optional (since it may not be washed). The washer we have is small and although we have 2 dryers, neither is really adept at getting the clothes dry quickly. The washer takes between 25 – 30 minutes to wash maybe two pairs of pants and a couple of shirts but that is it. When they come home, they put their clothes in the washer and change. Their PE outfits go into the hamper and wait for me to arrive to transfer the washed clothes into the dryers (or if it is nice, out on the line to dry….take that Al Gore!). The problem is I instantly have to do a second load which won’t see the dryer before bedtime and I can’t just keep washing all night because I have other important things to do (like play the Xbox or stare blankly at the TV and talk to myself, which is something I do anyhow even when Tammy is there but I like to pretend that she listens and enjoys my babbling. Actually I think she is online with a support group for women with husbands who believe every line they say is comedic genius.) I’ve gotten 3 loads done before I crash for the night but I don’t seem to be making a dent in the pile of laundry since the kids come home and change, then change again after showers. It’s ridiculous, you would think that they would enjoy being able to wear “dirty” clothes.

So I miss posting on Wednesday because I didn’t get the blog written in time. Our VPN that we were using was discovered by the “Evil Empire” and has been blocked. So now, I can’t access the blog site from home at any time. It’s one of the downsides to living here. There is also talk that “they” want to take over Skype. I hope that is just a rumor but you really never know what to expect here. It will be what it will be and no amount of griping on my part will make a difference. It will be "for the common good" (does that sound like a familiar refrain coming from DC?) and to ensure the public safety. Honestly, if they have time to listen in on the Skype conversations and review the chats, they've got waaaay too much time on their hands. I think they'd be pretty bored with what they read and hear as opposed to what the probably think they would be able to uncover about the evil foreigners.

Anyhow, Tuesday night, curry (homemade). Wednesday night, pizza (delivery). Thursday night, yet to be decided. I think that we will go with the old spaghetti standby. I'm sure the kids will want Sherpas again but I'd rather just cook something (I've got leftover curry I can eat) and clear out the fridge. Tammy will be home on Friday so the adventures of Camp Dudley will end and she can post her “backpacking” tour of Cambodia for you to enjoy (along with many photos).

Dora_II

Day 2 begins in relative calm compared to the quagmire that started Day 1. The kids finding out they didn’t have a key to the apartment just when they are exiting (of course, if I had not asked, they would’ve found out when they returned home…it might have been a good lesson for them as they sat out in the hallway waiting for me to come home from work). Using my calm demeanor and superior focus in times of crisis (yes that’s right, I yelled at them…sue me!), I explained the ramifications of the situation as I quickly packed a lunch and we all headed out in the rain to grab a taxi to drop them off at school and then take me to work. It wasn’t pretty because when it rains, the cabs are few and far between as their business picks up when people don’t want to ride the bikes to work and get soaked.

I came home from work and found the kids in the normal position, Jacob sprawled out with headphones in playing his computer games, Warren doing homework on the other seat. They had started the laundry (meaning he had pressed the “On” button) and had their clothes washing. Dinner was leftovers or instant noodle bowls because I had to go to Chinese class. I told Warren to use both dryers since the clothes wouldn’t dry out in the rain (I know I should not have had to explain this but since they only hear about 2 out of every 10 words, I have to be sure they understand). After class, it was snack, brush teeth and bedtime for the kids. I continued to wash clothes but since our dryers are really bad (takes about 1 hour to dry a pair of underwear) I had to shuffle what was being dried and hang some less important items to dry today. I also started a second load of laundry since I had a chance. No chance I would get it in the dryer but I could at least get it ready for morning. I played my Xbox game and then went to bed after my wife decided she didn’t want to talk to me (actually she had a long day “backpacking” and didn’t make it back to the hotel until very late).

So this morning, it’s still raining and I use my lightning-quick verbal reflexes to “discuss” with my children why they should take the small umbrella. Eventually my superior argument wins the day! (meaning they didn’t have a choice) I give them a small plastic bag to put the umbrella into their bookbags so it doesn’t get everything wet. I left it to them to decide who would carry this cumbersome load (you will, no you will, I don’t want the stupid thing, I don’t care, I’m not carrying it….) and then put the plastic bag into Jacob’s backpack. It was at this time that I discovered that he had his PE outfit in his bag. Was this the same PE outfit that I had placed on the rack to dry last night??? One touch and there was no denying it…it was the same one. It wasn’t wringing wet but it sure bordered on very damp. “Jacob (I say with my normal compassion), why didn’t you tell me you needed this today?” I don’t know (ah yes, the old familiar refrain that covers all questions that you don’t want to answer). “It’s wet (in my concerned voice, the old you’ll catch a cold thing)” I don’t care (and so it ends). Okay, enjoy running around in your wet pants, let everyone know your pants were wet before you went to basketball practice or maybe they’ll think you had an accident. Then I threw them out to go and catch the bus. I should’ve told him to put on his PE clothes and he wouldn’t need the umbrella but sometimes the enlightened banter from a teenager temporarily stuns me into silence (something like listening to members of Congress).

So day 2 begins with less excitement but just as much fun. Tonight I’ll have to try and cook something for dinner so I’ll let you know how that works out.

Dora the Explorer

Last weekend, Tammy and a couple of female friends took a day off from the men and headed to Shanghai for an overnight stay while the kids and I remained back in Suzhou. I know, you’re asking yourself “How is it possible that she needs time away from me?” I have a hard time believing it myself….it’s got to be the kids, they drive everyone crazy. (One example, the kids have “discovered” Weird Al Yankovic, I know how odd that sounds since he has been around for years, and they are playing “White and Nerdy” on both computers as I write this but the songs are not in sync so there’s a delayed stereo sound to it.) However, that was just a precursor for what was yet to come. This Saturday, she and a couple of friends headed off to Cambodia for some “backpacking” (I call it her “Dora the Explorer” trip). She is going to see Angkor Wat and a couple of other areas of interest in Cambodia on her week away. She and her friends kept calling it a backpacking tour of Vietnam and Cambodia but it isn’t exactly as you would see it in your mind when you think of backpacking. The Vietnam came off the trip and the focus remained on Cambodia. Although it isn’t really backpacking and roughing it, it probably isn’t a luxury vacation either. They found some decent places to stay and will see as much as they can before they return.

Again, I know you are asking yourself “How can anyone handle being apart from Scott for more than one week?” Yet another good question and yet another one that I blame on the kids! Actually, we have wanted to get to Angkor Wat as a family but I know that it’s not really one of those trips where there is a lot to do for the kids and with the time running short, I am happy that at least one of us will get out to see a little more of this part of the world while we have the chance. Perhaps if you beg, she’ll blog about her trip to Cambodia (backpack-backpack, backpack-backpack). She has taken both cameras and a small notebook on her journey to collect the memories for several blog posts so she should have plenty of stories to tell.

How do the kids and I get along with her gone? Well, it’s not the same and they know it. This isn’t like when I left and came over to China for 3 months without the kids. It’s different because without her here, the kids have to take a little more on themselves while I am at work. It’s not like this isn’t done every day back home but it is new for them. They understand that dinner will be later than normal and perhaps the menu will be a little less diverse. Tammy has added in Indian curries to her repertoire and I have no idea how to do that. I can cook many different things (wheat toast, white toast, rye toast…I almost qualified for Top Chef, but then they asked me to cook on the stove and the dream was over). When Tammy goes somewhere overnight by herself it’s referred to as “Camp Dudley”. When I am away for a night, it is party time!

One night they can live with, a whole week….that’s going to be a bigger challenge for all of us. Tammy will be using Skype on her phone to keep in touch with us so we look forward to hearing from her and hearing a bit about her day. Unfortunately, when you think of modern amenities you don’t necessarily think of Cambodia at the top of the list (Wireless, yes we have no wires.). We’ll have to wait and see how that turns out but either way, we’ll have photos and stories to listen to when she arrives home. The question is what will her family look like upon her return? Will the kids be disheveled and appear like refugees that had to escape some evil warlord (um, that would be me)? Will we all look a little leaner since the food options have diminished (mmmm, peanut butter on noodles, I like it but not every night)? Will my hair completely fall out or turn 100% gray? {Add in your own question in this spot}

This morning we found out that we only have one key for the apartment between the three of us and we can’t lock the door without the key. Someone (not me) has lost their keys but since they arrive home before me we have to travel together to school & work (ahhh togetherness). This tells you how the “Backpack-Backpack” week started for the men of the house. It’s not looking promising for the home team and it’s only Monday.

The good life

Many times I have had discussions with my Chinese colleagues about the differences between the US and China (nothing political or along the political lines, I keep away from discussions around that stuff, too many landmines there). Sometimes it is very interesting to hear their perspective on things and try to see things from a different viewpoint. I’ve worked with many Canadians and with them you can talk politics (although it tends to be them baiting me on the Republican/Democrat stuff) and although they come from a slightly different system of governance, it’s not the same thing.
This past week I spent time talking to two of my colleagues and tried to get them to understand what is happening in the US and what life is really like back home for many. The discussion started when I was told that they believe I would be here for many years, which I indicated is not a true statement. There was some surprise that I may be leaving soon and it seemed that they felt I would remain in Suzhou as part of the company for many, many years. I pointed out all of the other Expats that had worked here and since left to go home. “Okay, but you will have a good job when you go back home.” When I told them that my plant had closed, they seemed rather shocked that perhaps there wasn’t a job for me at home. “But you have so much experience, it will be easy to find a job.” I indicated that experience doesn’t count for much in today’s world. I had to point out to them that Matt (whom they knew, if you don’t know you can go back to read about Matt in previous posts) had gone back and was looking for a job. Huh!!! Matt is not working?. I indicated to them that other Expats that had left also did not have jobs. They were incredulous, how can that be? Why are they not working for the company? I had to point out that many of us came from sites that had closed their doors and that the plants were relocated to Suzhou. It still didn’t seem to hit home to them that these people they met were essentially out of work so they could have a job. I think they kind of understood but they didn’t seem to completely grasp the situation. All they know is that China is booming and there are jobs to be had for anyone that wants to work. They could not understand how the US was not in the same situation. For them, the US was always seen as the good life.

They hit me with the “good life” thing and I had to set the record straight. They thought that in the US, Healthcare was free. I told them that it was not, they were surprised. They thought that when you lost your job, the government paid you (I would guess this to be unemployment). I told them that this was true but the payment was not much and it was for a limited amount of time. They thought that when you retired, the government paid you. I told them again that this was partially true, you got paid Social Security but it did not mean you lived like a emperor. They have thought all along that in the US, the government would be there to get you through your life. Now some of the things were partially true but I told them about all of the economic issues and the housing issues in the US that is causing all of the problems. People accumulating too much debt and then walking away from their debt and perhaps filing for bankruptcy. They didn’t understand this at all because in China, the government owns the banks and if you can’t pay the banks for your house, you go to prison. If you try to leave your home and escape the mortgage payment, the government will find you when you relocate to a new area and you go to prison. Harsh, maybe but it’s probably a stronger deterrent to spending too much money than anything we have back home. I gave them the “there’s no such thing as a free puppy” speech and said everything is paid for through taxes. I get Social Security but it’s not the government paying me, it’s the government giving me my money back because I paid into the system. The healthcare thing hasn’t played out yet but I told them that the only way to pay for healthcare was to tax me so it wasn’t free. I was paying for it (even if I didn’t use it). At the moment, I pay into a health insurance plan through the company, it’s not free, it comes out of my check. I indicated the costs for healthcare in the US were rising faster than anything else so no matter if you got a pay increase each year, the costs for your insurance plan took that money and then some so you were actually still losing take home pay every year. Could it be worse, of course it could.

“But in America, you have human rights.” I didn’t touch this one; I just said it depends on what you refer to as a human right. I will not go off on a rant here although I am itching for one. It doesn’t apply to the story. They thought in the US, you had a job, a house, a car, money and everything would be handed to you on a silver platter. They did not think the US was a hard life. Everyone has a hard life, it doesn’t matter where you live it’s just how you define a hard life. People can work on a farm and work from dawn to dusk and be happy but for others; we would say that is a hard life. It’s a matter of perception. I told them that it’s about what you believe makes you happy. For too many in the US, there has been a separation from the belief system of our predecessors. Many now chase the “bling” to try and grab a piece of the good life. If their friend has a 60” plasma TV, they have to have one as well (or a bigger one). If their friend has a new car, they also need a new car. They chase the “Joneses” and never really understand why. The good life has been replaced by the “not good enough life”. Everything we have isn’t good enough so we go and buy more. I know I can’t pay the bills but I’ve got to have it, now the debt collector is calling and you are stuck. The generations before us that worked so hard to provide the opportunity for the good life would be appalled at how easily we’ve become distracted by things that don’t matter. The manta, “he who dies with the most toys wins” comes to mind. It’s a pretty sad statement.

So what is the good life? Is it something you can touch or show off to your friends or does it come from inside? What creates the good life, independence or dependence? It’s up to you to decide.

Viewing Habits

What’s on TV tonight? It’s a question that we used to ask all of the time. During football season it was the discussion not on what we would watch but which game we would watch. Over here, we don’t really have that luxury and had to make sacrifices, most notably the change in our television viewing habits. Our “blackbeard” (aarrrrggh!) satellite box allows us to see a few of the channels from the US but we don’t have nearly as many options (but we are thankful to have at least a few English options, if we were in a more remote area of China I am pretty certain we would have zero options). Many times we are actually watching previous seasons of shows rather than the current season for anything. What else can we do to keep up with our favorite shows? Well, there still are a few options on the Internet to watch shows but some (as I mentioned previously) have been blocked by the US Government (thanks again! Way to balance the budget!).

The other option we have here is to purchase DVDs of our favorite shows (or shows we could never watch in the past). Of course, the season may not be the current one but if we show some patience, we can wait until the end of the season and purchase the entire season on one (or maybe two) DVDs. We can also go back and buy television shows that have gone off the air (Seinfeld, etc.) so we can watch them over and over (The Simpsons never gets old…unless you talk to Tammy, she’s about over the Simpsons references). We can also watch the latest movies from the US. Unfortunately for us (or maybe fortunately depending on your viewpoint), we never really have been strong movie goers so we have bought a lot of movies but haven’t watched many of the movies we have purchased. It’s not that big of a deal though because we didn’t spend $19.99 for the movie, we spent like $1.00 for the movie. If we find ourselves with a lot of time, we’ll be able to sit back and watch movies for days. Our collection happens to pale in comparison to many of the other Expat’s collections but we’re happy with it. We’re still filling in the blanks and getting those movies that we have always wanted but never had the inkling to run to the DVD store and buy them. Some of the movies are the classics like Casablanca, The Wizard of Oz and stuff like that just so we can look like we have some class but then again, we also bought Dumb and Dumber so perhaps the points we gain from the classic movies are countered by the other movies (when we buy Weekend at Bernies, then I know we’ve gone over the edge and there’s no going back).

So today kids, we are going to play Siskel & Ebert and tell you about the movies and shows we have watched over the past months. Many of the shows come from recommendations from friends back home, some we liked and some we really didn’t like but we gave them a try.

From the movie genre, Despicable Me, Tangled are the latest movies we have watched. I think the other ones we have watched recently have all been the animated movies. Despicable Me was pretty funny, Tangled…not so much. Tangled went back to the old Disney style where it was more of an animated musical as opposed to a movie. Too much singing ruined the movie. We’ve bought a lot of the animated movies here, some were older like Monsters vs Aliens. That was another good one that I bought early on here and can still sit and watch it and enjoy the movie. I have to buy another copy since the copy I purchased was a so-so movie. Alice in Wonderland was another one we bought which was obviously taped at the theatre (since you can watch the guy in the front row get up to go get some popcorn or whatever). Many people would probably throw away the so-so movies but we’re going to keep them just because. It’ll be one of those, “remember the movies we got in China” flashbacks.

As far as television shows/series;
Nurse Jackie – A Showtime series, we watched seasons 1 and 2. This show stars Edie Falco (she played the wife of Tony Soprano from “The Sopranos”, maybe you’ve heard of it) as a drug addicted nurse who is having an affair with a co-worker (placing her husband and two girls on the backburner). We haven’t ever had HBO or Showtime or any of those channels so this was a show we first saw on the flight home from China this summer. It was kinda funny and very quirky but an oddly entertaining show. It’s not a great show and seems to takeoff of House without the medical focus but instead focuses more on Jackie. I watch shows like this and wonder about the message behind them. Sometimes I think they want to create likeable characters with major flaws and challenge you to judge them (if you dare!). They want to justify the actions of the character and show that people can be flawed but still deserve some kind of sympathy or something from you but by God, don’t judge them. I don’t know, if I start down this road I don’t think I’d watch a lot of TV. It’s not a bad show but it’s not one of those shows that I have to watch.

24 – I love 24, we purchased the entire series and have finished off season 8 (the final season). Once again they kept you hooked all the way through and brought back some of the characters that you loved to hate from previous seasons. This is another show that you watch and think that Jack Bauer should be what every undercover agent should be but you know that in real life people would be crying out for a public hanging of the man because of his torture techniques to get information. It’s like this with just about every movie, you love the cops that go out and bend the rules to get the bad guy but in the real world, all of those “more enlightened” people would want them fired and thrown into prison. Eventually 24 had to end but it was always an entertaining show and kept me looking forward to the next episode. I’ve got them all so I can watch them again whenever I want. It was a corny ending to the final season but nothing ever works out for Jack and who knows…maybe he’ll be back.

Dexter – This show wasn’t really for us. The premise of a serial killer working for the medical examiner’s office was a little too weird (are we supposed to feel good that the serial killer kills bad guys…..I do. Anytime the bad guys get it, I’m happy). We couldn’t really get into the show or the characters after watching about 6 episodes, however we did purchase the first 3 seasons (it was the only option) so perhaps we’ll come back to the show in the future. But maybe not, it was just weird.

Hot in Cleveland – This show was an absolute riot. Betty White makes the show, her comic timing and line deliveries are perfect, we’re waiting for the second season to see if they can continue to build upon the first. It is a little risqué and goes with some more tongue-in-cheek references but overall it’s a very funny show. Definitely not for the kids but I liked it and hope the second season comes out soon.

Sons of Anarchy – This is a show about a biker gang (don’t judge them because of their tattoos, they’re just people) called the Sons of Anarchy or Sam Crow, among other things. It was an easy show to get into and if you can get past the language, violence and borderline gratuitous nudity, it’s a show you could handle. Somehow this was on FX or something but I don’t know how based on what we saw. We bought Seasons 1 and 2, then were able to get Season 3 shortly after the real season 3 ended. We liked it a lot and hope there will be a Season 4. It’s definitely not for the kids unless you want to do a lot of explaining. Again, they try to suck you in to believing that these guys aren’t really all that bad, they are just a motorcycle club (that runs guns, drugs and anything else for a buck) that’s down on their luck. You come to hate the FBI and ATF agents in the show that go against the club so it’s a show that has you rooting for the bad guys (should I feel guilty?).

Some other strange mini-series that we have watched over the past few months are Rome and Spartacus. These shows are both set around the same time in Rome (duh!) and are close to the same but they are not similar in writing or effect. Rome was an interesting show that was at times overly graphic and contained a lot of bare butt (among other things). Definitely not a show you want to watch with your kids or your parents. However, the characters (and therefore the writing) were very compelling and kept you watching despite the other things in the show that made you wonder why they had to do that. Rome could’ve easily survived without the nudity and such but I am sure they were trying to depict the debauchery that was Rome during the heyday of the empire. Now Spartacus, we picked this up because of the Rome series, but it is another story. The special effects I can only assume were supposed to be 3D but they look like a bad comic book or perhaps an odd takeoff on the old Batman and Robin (“BAM!!!”, “BIFF!!!, “POW!!!”). They just look dumb and make you giggle when you see it. In comparison to Rome, this series makes Rome look like the Amish were the producers. If you watch for more than 5 minutes without seeing nudity (first name Seymour, last name Butts) or something worse, they are slacking and I am certain someone was fired. We’ve watched only a few episodes and it was just too much, little story, lotta other stuff. Perhaps it will get better but I doubt it.

If you have suggestions for other shows or movies that you liked, let us know. We will go out and find them and let you know what we think.

Expectations

I’ll take a moment to make a comment about workers in China. This is a general comment and is not applicable for everyone but it’s no different than the general comments made all the time in the media. I’ve stayed away from posting stuff that is work related due to what I have seen on the Internet about people being fired for making admittedly bad decisions and posting negative information about their boss, colleagues, company, etc. I don’t think this is quite the same so I will forgo the usual paranoia and post it.

For years we’ve been told that Americans are lazy and don’t want to work, this is why there is migrant (now known as displaced foreigner travelers as opposed to illegal immigrants [call the PC police, radical elements are running amuck on this blog]) labor to do the work that “Americans won’t do”. Low wage jobs or jobs that require someone to work hard are left others to handle, too many people are too good to do this kind of work (or at least that is what they would have you believe. Mike Rowe shows you otherwise, if you don’t know Mike Rowe, you need to watch Dirty Jobs on Discovery Channel).

This isn’t an “American disease” as we have been led to believe. In the US, the job market has been and continues to be very poor and people are scrambling to find work, many are looking at jobs that perhaps 5 years ago they would’ve overlooked but now a job is a job and most people just want to contribute to society rather than sit back and let someone else pay for them to get by. Good people that are hard-working and loyal to their companies have lost their jobs due to circumstances that are outside of their control. In China, there is an expanding job market, especially in the larger cities. So it seems that perhaps the Chinese are now the people that don’t want to work. I’ll give you an example (these events are real; the names of the people have been changed to protect the innocent). A worker accepts a job to work for a company. (After a probation period, the company could choose not to continue to employ the worker if the worker doesn’t show any promise during the probation period.) At that time they understand the salary of the job and the work required, it’s all pretty straight forward. (You should see the resumes here, they contain age, marital status, some even have photos, and many other things that are taboo back in the US..a topic for another time.). So they go through the orientation training (usually between 3 to 5 days) and then begin the actual training for the task they are hired to perform. Then after two weeks on the job (and still within the probation period), they don’t show up to work. The supervisor tries to contact them and cannot contact the worker. This is a violation of the company policy and the worker will be given a verbal reprimand which will go on his permanent record with the company (dun-dun-daah...make the sound with a very ominous undertone). The next day, he comes back to work and is given the verbal reprimand. Then he is supposed to sign a document indicating that he was given the warning and understands the warning. This is when it gets interesting. He declines to sign the document and proceeds to indicate that the job requires him to work too hard and doesn’t pay enough. It’s at that time that he decides to resign (you can’t fire me, I quit!). In China, people don’t quit, they resign. I don’t know why this term is always used but I guess “to quit” has a bad connotation where “to resign” is more of a positive spin on the term. Resigning is more like I left on my terms as opposed to quitting where it’s like you gave up and the company had the last laugh. Perhaps this is cultural but this guy actually decides that it is better to resign than admit he was wrong not to show up to work. We see this “logic” used in so many different scenarios here that it is almost comical. Anytime someone does something wrong, you need to leave them room to wiggle out of actually being wrong. You use terms like “maybe” to describe what might have happened when you know darned well exactly what did happen. This has been probably my biggest hurdle to overcome when an issue comes up. They try to find any possible explanation for what happened (the machine was working right, the lights over the machine weren’t on, the planets weren’t aligned properly…) rather than admit they were wrong or they didn’t do the right thing. They know what happened, you know what happened but you shouldn’t let them know that you know else they lose face. It’s like strange takeoff of the Abbott & Costello “Who’s on first” routine. My personal favorite excuse, "the work instruction doesn't say we should do that every time".

I’ve heard of other similar instances where workers will just not show up to work. In some cases, they change their phone number and do other things to avoid being contacted by their former employer. Many times, if you speak to their co-workers you will hear them talk about the former employee being unhappy with the amount of work required and the low pay. It’s such a strange situation knowing what is happening back home (dude, it’s a job keep working until you find a better one). It’s definitely not an American thing, it can happen anywhere. It’s more about the person and their work ethic and not about their country of origin.

I will take this a step further to talk about what may be the culture here (I can never be sure because so many people tell you different things). People here expect the chance to advance in their company (much like many in the US expect something). When someone takes a job to operate a machine, they can become very skilled at this job and actually enjoy the work but if they don’t see any chance for advancement they will typically seek another job after about 1-2 years with a company. Keep in mind that again, I am talking in generalities but this is what I am told and what I have experienced. People take jobs and may love the job and the company but the grass (bamboo) is always greener somewhere else so they look for another job. This is more true of the younger generation, as people get past 30 and start to have a stable home life (kids…if you call that stable), they seem to be more inclined to find a good paying job and stick with it. The younger kids…not so much. It’s even more evident around this time of year. People collect their New Year’s bonus and then the resignations start. They head home to be with their family and then they decide not to come back to work. It’s much more rare here to find people that have been with the same company for a long time, as opposed to what used to be the normal situation back home (before the economic downturn), people stayed with a job if they liked the company and the work.

Why do I tell you this (besides the fact that it is very informative)? Because of the reason I am an Expat. I am in China to train people to manufacture our products using the equipment and procedures that I know work best. I also try to train them on how to troubleshoot the equipment, determine what is or isn’t a quality product and how to work efficiently among many other things. Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn’t. I am training in two separate departments so I’ve got a lot of ground to cover with a lot of different people. Somehow, I’ve got to give my 18 years worth of experience to people in whatever time I have with them. In one department, we originally hired 6 people, of those only 1 remains. In the other department, we also hired 6 people, only 3 originals remain. Is it me? It’s tough not to take it personally when people you have come to know leave to go off and find other work. In some cases, I was happy to see people go (bad attitudes or very poor work ethic). However when the people I have worked the most with are starting to leave; it becomes much more difficult to accept. One of my best workers told me just before the Chinese New Year that she wanted to resign. She was very upset and crying about her decision and I had a hard time trying to understand why she was leaving even as she talked to me about the decision. We have worked together for 18 months and I think of her as family so it was tough for me to listen and not react negatively to what she was saying. Back home, I would’ve said she was homesick and needed to go home and think before making her decision but since there is a cultural barrier that I may not understand, I could only ask her to reconsider and wait until after the holiday to make a final decision. She’s 22 years old and is an excellent worker. She has a bright future with the company but she will not stay to find out what the future holds for her with this company. She has been to college and therefore is owed a better job than “just being an operator and Team Leader”. I hope it works out for her but there is a little part of me that wishes she finds out that her next job is much worse than this one (then I get to say the oh-so satisfying “I told you so”).

Why do I tell you this? I guess I’m just sharing the frustration of encountering these types of situations. When I have family & friends that are unemployed and are trying to find work, it’s tough to stomach that someone can walk away from a job because they are expected to actually work for their wages (granted the wages in US terms are low but for here, the pay is pretty darned good) or when they feel they can do better elsewhere. It’s not like they have a job when they leave, they just leave and find another job. When people I have trained leave, it means that I have essentially wasted my time on someone that won’t be around when I leave. So I have to start over with the next person and hope that the limited time I have to work with them is enough. This is the role of the Expat! Basically your job is to make sure you don’t have a job. I’m not here to entrench myself so deeply in the facility that any thought of me leaving would destroy the fabric of the universe (this is the one that would bring balance to the force). I am here to show people how to do the job and then go back home. I’m not complaining (not really), I’m just sharing.

Catching Up

Since it is the Chinese New Year, I am off from work and the kids are out of school (and Tammy is being driven crazy). This gives me a lot of time to get the Blog updated with the most recent activities that are happening. I want to write the blog at least once per week (something my friend Lon has challenged himself to do on his blog so I can’t take credit for the idea) but sometimes I get distracted by other things and don’t find the time to get the post written. Other times, I start the post but never get it completed so it sits in a folder waiting for me to finish the job (which may or may not get done). So I will attempt to catchy everyone up to date in a long post (which is no surprise to anyone).

First, let’s talk about the Chinese and their fireworks. The evening of Feb. 2nd is New Years Eve. Starting about dusk, fireworks started to go off all around us. I’m not talking about the bottle rockets, roman candles or those little sparkle fountains (although these were done as well). I’m talking about the 70+ shot mortar boxes and strings of 5,000 firecrackers. Seriously, it started around 7:00pm and didn’t really finish up until about 12:30am and when it was midnight….forget about it. From our view on the 9th floor in the middle of our apartment complex we could see many fireworks going off in all directions. The best were the ones between buildings where the fireworks were exploding and bouncing off from the apartments. These ones you could feel in your chest every time one exploded in a shower of green and red sparkles. I can’t adequately describe the experience except to say that it probably resembles (just by the sounds) what a war zone would be like during a mortar barrage. It’s fun to watch for about the first hour or so and then it becomes like a constant background noise. Then it ramps up to “these people are crazy” when the midnight battery of fireworks starts exploding all around you. We could see at least 8 different large fireworks displays going off just from standing in one spot. We knew this was coming but it is always a little more than you would expect. We have earplugs so we could sleep but after 12:30, it calmed down enough for us to sleep without them (until the fireworks started again about 7:00am).

Second, since we have returned from Thailand, Tammy has taken it upon herself to learn how to cook Thai food. We (Tammy and I) already really enjoyed Thai cuisine before we went to Thailand but now the family seems to be hooked. We found that one of the hotels held cooking classes on Saturdays and she went to learn (and to escape the madness). She first learned Ribs with Red Curry, Seafood Salad and Spring Rolls. She brought home the food from the class and it was exactly what we tasted in Thailand. So, she decided to go the next week where she would learn Pad Thai, Papaya Salad and Green Curry Chicken. Once again, delicious!!! Since then, we’ve had Red Curry, Masaman Curry, Spring Rolls, Pad Thai and Tom Yang Soup for dinner or lunch. Now, she’ll tell you that maybe we aren’t telling her the truth about the taste of the food but I’ll tell you one secret (and now it’s not a secret). If the food is bad, I’ll tell you. There’s nothing worse than eating a bad meal and saying “This is delicious.” Shouldn’t I tell a little white lie? The answer is simple. If I tell her that something is good, she’s going to cook it again (and again, and again). If it was terrible, that means I’ve got to stomach it again and again (till death do us part) until I finally admit the truth and she gets mad because I lied. It is better with food to be honest up front (just another of Scott’s rules for a good marriage). In this case, it’s no lie. The curry dishes are great (you can make the Tony the Tiger “grrrr-eat” here if you want), the spring rolls taste just like Flavors of Thailand (a restaurant in Jonesboro). She has a little work to perfect the Pad Thai but that’s about getting the right ingredients more than anything else. Once those ingredients are found (if we can find them in China, keep in mind shopping for ingredients is tougher here since we can’t read the labels), I think we’re on the way to Thai delights. She is also scheduled to learn how to make Indian curry and Samosas in the coming month so if I come back to the US a few pounds heavier, you’ll know why.

Third, I found out that my oldest brother now has a blog (you’ll find the link under the links section). Two of the Dudley clan have now decided to take on the blogosphere. Now that I know he’s out there, the gauntlet has been thrown down to keep posting on a more regular basis in order to maintain interest in my blog. There’s a lot of competition out there and now it’s all in the family. I shouldn’t neglect to mention that my niece also has her own blog but I’ll warn you ahead of time, she’s young and in love (insert sound of vomiting here). Her blog relates mainly to her preparations to get married in late June. It’s interesting reading from afar since we don’t have access to hear about the wedding on a regular basis. [In case you didn’t know, Tammy and I eloped to Gatlinburg, TN (the East Coast Vegas) we had very little wedding planning to do. We just scheduled to date and time and headed out.] Anyhow, it is interesting to read how things are going for her and fiancé Doug. I’m sure as the date continues to approach, the stress levels will rise but I think they can handle it. After all, it’s not getting married that creates stress; it’s staying married that creates stress. Sounds like a t-shirt doesn’t it?

Fourth (and speaking of t-shirts), the t-shirts you see here are funny. I am never certain if the people really know what the shirts say or the meaning of the words. Some examples;
* Think Liberation (really, in China?)
* Time’s up, take it if you want it. (worn by a young lady in Shanghai and no, I don’t think she was a working girl)
* Make Love, Not Babies
* Keep the Faith
* F___ my Life (with little hearts around it….and the F-word was spelled out, correctly I might add)
* I love BJ (unfortunately, the shirt is supposed to be I love Beijing but they use an abbreviation for Beijing that has other connotations in English…and I don’t mean Bob Jones. How do I know BJ is Beijing, because in Shanghai they sell the same type of shirt with “I love SH”, not so sure I like that one either.)
* Kiss me, I’m Irish (okay, I made that one up just because it’s funny. The others are real.)
It happens all of the time, we see these shirts and wonder a) where they got them and b) do they realize what they say. I mean, when you buy a shirt, typically you know what it says right? I mean, I don’t buy shirts with Chinese characters without knowing what they say (remember the ObamaMao shirt, I bought it and found out what it said before I ever put it on). Oh, and just so you know this isn’t just a China thing. In Thailand we saw a t-shirt that said “Sleep with me…free breakfast”.

This last note is about a story Tammy found online about an incident in Suzhou. This is a true story folks so enjoy it.
Car hits pet dog, owner forces driver to kneel for an hour
By

Tiffany Ap on Jan 14, 2011
This is a story that will make it so much easier for you to hate on pet owners who dress up their toy dogs in stupid clothing. In nearby Suzhou, a pet dog was accidentally crushed by a passing minivan. How is this news? Just stay with me.

The loss of a pet can be upsetting yes, but at the same time (please pardon my French), shit happens. There's no sense in attacking people over it or forcing people to kneel over your dead pet as an apology, but unfortunately for the driver and passenger of the car in this story, that's a memo the dog owner never received.

An eyewitness who requested to remain anonymous says he was watching from his building when around 12 noon, he saw a green postal minivan hit a dog that'd come out into the street suddenly. When the driver and passenger got out to check, the life had been well snuffed out of the pooch. The owner, a 20-something male, was furious over his dog, demanded 5,000 RMB in compensation, and even started getting physical with the men. When the two men from the minivan didn't have the money to pay up, he forced them to kneel in front of his dead dog's body for one hour.

An older woman who saw the commotion decided to call the police but neither side allowed the police to intervene when they arrived. After their hour of kneeling in the wind and cold was up, the dog owner took the body away and the two men who'd been forced to kneel got up and left without saying a word.